Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

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why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

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A rapist walks into a bar He orders a drink He wakes up the next morning naked on a hot chick He leaves not realizing that he is nude and is promptly escorted by the police to jail

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What did the girl tell her abusive boyfriend Girl: You broke my heart! Boyfriend: I'm gonna break your face.

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Q: Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: Because he was hit by a bus, and then was raped violently. He is currently undergoing psychotherapy.

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What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

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How did the mexican die while fixing a lightbulb? He fell off the ladder.

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roses are red violets are blue heres the oven now where the **** is the jew

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What are you going to get your mom for mothers day? I have two gay dads.

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how do stick a dead baby into a blender and why???????? feet first so u can see the reaction on top.

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What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

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roses are red , violets are blue, lick my dick , or lick my dick

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Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

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A thief stole a calendar. Later, feeling guilty, he returned it to its owner, admitted his misconduct, and went to a local minimart to purchase his own.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my life didn't start, until I met you! :) Megan _____

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass...i lied about the wheels

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

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what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

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69

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Nice ass. Too bad it's cracked in the middle, though.

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dat shoe shine tho

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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