Why don't woman wear watches? Because there is a clock on the stove!

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A blonde just got a call from her boyfriend. He said i'll meet you at your house, so the blonde drove home, excited. Once the blonde got home her boyfriend was having sex with another girl. The blonde burst into tears and pulled out her gun then stuck it to her head. " No dont do it!" her boyfriend said!...... the blonde, not knowing what to do next said, " Shut up you cheater you're next!"

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What did the man say when he saw his t.v. floating in the middle of the night? I must be seeing things. By logic, televisions don't float. My weary eyes must be playing tricks on me and I should probably go back to sleep.

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roses are red violets are blue your moms a whore thats it

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What is big, round, hairy, black with a little bit of white and red stripes, large feet, small hands, squinty eyes and a purple beret? Nothing. How ridiculous.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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Ms Leong Sux

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You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

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Your moms so stupid she ate all the food in the grocery store

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Why didn't the cat play with the ball of yarn? It was drowned in a toilet.

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whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

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Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

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how do yopu punish helen keller? Ground her, just like you would with any other child.

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A magician tells the boy to get into the box and locks him in. He wasn't a magician.

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Jack, John, Justin, Joseph and Jimmy walk into a bar. They order a pint of beer and start wondering what their names have in common.

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"What the hell is wrong with you?" "..."

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Q: What did Bobby get for his first birthday ? A: Adoption papers

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why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

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Why did the bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

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What do you call a mexican man with a rubber toe? Ruberto.

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what Did The Cow Say To The Chicken, Moo

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Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

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I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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