What is Sally's favorite flavor ice cream? She can't eat ice cream, she's lacktose and tollerant.

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Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

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Why did the Mexican man grow a mustache? It wasn't his choice. Men naturally grow facial hair and he ran out of razors.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have Cancer."

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

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What is the difference between a black person and a pizza? Nothing, they both taste like chicken

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Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

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What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

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What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out the chamber.

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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caoimhin is a dorty carrot

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What's worse than a guy staring at you? Two guys staring at you.

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These Jokes suck.

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a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the span of 5 hours.

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Q: What is the difference between a moose and a cow? A: How they're spelled.

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"bluar blah blah blarRR/ the stupid pointless part" dead people/ animals/ objects can't talk/ drive/ operate compueter, lol I'm so focken funni

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What's black and sits at the top of the stair case? Stephen hawking in a house fire.......

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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