What do Kobe Bryant and a toaster have in common? They both rape white women. Except for the toaster.

Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worse than finding two worms in your apple? Being raped with a cheese grater.

no

Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

What happens when 4 friends throw an egg into oncoming traffic, they hit a fire hydrant!

The Walmart Scooterwhale (Terracetus obesitus) is the only member of the cetacean family to live in a terrestrial environment. Commonly found in large-scale grocery stores all across North America, it subsists mostly on fattening junk food, microwave popcorn, and beer.

Yo' mama's so poor that she can't afford many of the privileges of everyday life.

why did the boy fall over? because he was hit by a fridge that fell out of the tree.

What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

What's fatter than your mum? Your mum's mum

why was 6 afraid of 9? because 7 ate 9 and 6 is afraid of ghosts

roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

Why was the little girl crying. Her dad wiped his bloody penis with her teddybear.

Knock knock Who's there? A fireman. You're house burned down.

Your city streets are so bumpy that cars get flat tires when going to the gas station.

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

Why did the old lady walk across the road? She was on her way to the convenience store on the other side.

You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

What's black and white and red all over and can't turn around in an elevator? A nun with a spear through her back

Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...