Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

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What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

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what do you get when you mix peanut butter and jelly? a sweaty black guy

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Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

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A princess kisses a frog to aquire a prince.. then gets arrested for beastiality.

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What was the only thing the little boy from tanzania had? AIDS.

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How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

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A Chinese man... pulling another Chinese man in one of those carts behind him.

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"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

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you know whats funny?! nine eleven!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

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What's worse than reading? A lot, but there are too many things to name

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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The last head of Satan, is oh but what you blamed upon Your faults, Your sins. The thoughts of Madness written here, yet potent enough to cloud Your thoughts.... Wait not forever children of man, as eternity is at its peak, the false prophet IS AMONGST US! But what side is he on? The last ditch attempt to protect humanity from a raging jealous vengeful God? Say it is not so! Say that darkness is not the only thing standing against you and eternal damnation... ...Yet you killed his only true child, you stole his name, his essence... Even his Identity... ...Even the Angels white are powerless to stop him, Your maker, Your true maker, for what is the grief of the holy, from which you took his only son... ...As you celebrate once and once anew... :...Merry CHRISTmas, to all of those of you all now left behind... Celebrate it well, as before the world reaches 2017, is where it all ends...

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like this or you will die at some point in your life

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

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A child finally stood up to the school bullies! Recently the news did a story about a school shooting.

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What did the girl tell her abusive boyfriend Girl: You broke my heart! Boyfriend: I'm gonna break your face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops