How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa you set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

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knock knock. who's there? 9/11

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roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

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how did the man jump over the mountain? it was a small mountain and he had a trampoline

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Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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What do you call a Mexican hot dog? Lunch.

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What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

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Knock Knock. Come in.

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whats long and black on a black guy slavery

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why did the women give her sister a present because it was her birthday

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What sound did the Moon Man say to the Moon Woman? Nothing, there isn't an atmosphere so sound cannot travel.

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Who is the fastest kid in AA? Alex Solomos

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? Magic.

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What do you call a mexican and a African? Two people with no water.

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ur an fagit

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana Yoshimoto. A popular Japanese author of the book, Kitchen. She is incredibly talented and it would be a great honor to have her in your house, so you should open your door.

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Why did the man launch his rocket into the sun? He didn't. Overcoming the sun's orbital pull would require your rocket to travel ~7,400,000 mph, which is a velocity that is impossible for today's rockets to reach.

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Why did the mexican buy 50 tacos? Because he was taking them to the orphanage where he grew up. Isn't that nice?

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whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? - The boy scout comes home from camp.

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Why did'nt the puppy eat it's food? Because it was made up of little bits and peices of it's family.

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How do you cause ultimate pain to a imprisoned Jew during the holocaust? Moral: You give him an apple WITH a worm in it.

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What do old people break when they fight? A sweat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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