A man walks in to a bar and everyone screamed running out the door.

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I have read and agree to the terms of midget sex service - View Terms of Service

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What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants!"

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"DUDE! THERE IS A KNIFE IN YOUR LEG!" "SERIOUSLY!"

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You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

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Why did Jerry Sandusky rape little boys? Because his penis was hard and he needed to get his nut off quick

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What do you call a black man on the moon? A miracle

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What did the bullet say to Bin-Laden? Suck it

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what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

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way do Japan bomb pearl harbor because America hat sex with China [watch Hetalia]

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What's big with fat all over it? Your mom on this dick

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person 1: don't look person 2:Why person 1:because my shirt not on and my boobs are jiggiling

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Mamma why did the kids make fun of me today? I dont know.

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What's worse than seven babies in a trashcan? Not much.

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Why are black people like jelly beans? Nobody likes the black ones

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

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There's this Priest, a Rabbi and a Preacher talking about how similar they are.

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knock knock. whos there? the IRS you have recently filed for bankruptcy and we are repossessing your house.

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When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time.

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A little boy who was sleeping in his parents' bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't -- he said nothing, and the incident troubled him for many years.

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Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

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q. why did the guy forget what he did at the paty last night? a. because he had short term memory loss

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was experiencing financial troubles, and needed money. He tried applying for many jobs, but they just didn't quite work out. After ending up in the drug business to support his family, a deal went bad and he was shot, landing him in the hospital. The night his family arrived to check on him, the same shooter made his way to his room, and murdered his wife and 3 children, and somehow managed to evade police. Months after this incident, Ralph, the same chicken who was in the hospital and witnessed his family's murder, was finally released. He had nothing to live for, nothing to look forward to in the future. He took up alcohol abuse for some time, until realizing what truly had to be done. He began tracking down his family's killer, and with each day spent, he became closer and closer to discovering the dealer's whereabouts. One day, he finally figured out who it was. As he arrived at the killers' home, he took one last deep breath, then stormed in. After fighting through many of the dealers' body-gaurds, Ralph finally reached the notorious drug dealing murder, Froghorn Leghorn. As a bloody battle ensued, it was clear who the winner would be.. As Ralph staggered out of the destroyed home, bloodied, yet victorious, he realized something. All the tracking, all the killing, all the bloodshed he had created, was all in vain. He realized that taking Froghorn's life didn't, and wouldn't, bring his family back. Finding himself dumbfounded, he began to trot, head down, through the field where the bad drug deal happened, almost a year ago now. He took one last deep breath, looked at the stars, and took his first step on the road. This was it he decided, he was finally going to reunite with his family again once more. As the headlights raced towards him, he heard his family in unison whisper to him "You're finally home Ralph, you're finally home."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops