whats small and blue? a suffocated baby

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

Your Mom is so fat.... When she's goes to McDonald's and orders 3 Big Macs the people standing in line behind her all look at her with disgust and a tinge of pity.

a blonde does something stupid. she dies. its funny.

What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

What do you call a Puerto Rican, a Blonde, and an African woman in a taxi cab? Three people who happen to be traveling to the same location at the same point in time.

Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

Andi: I have a great knock-knock joke, but you need to start it. Jake: Okay...Knock-knock! Andi: Who's there? Jake: ...

Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

I'm called the! no i wish am I left

i asked my friend about the holocaust... umm it turns out hes a jew yaaa sorry then i screamed califona fire asin tits then ran

Why did Steve Jobs die? Because he had cancer

Death by kayak

What do a cow and a banana have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

why did the man commit scuicide because he was depressed

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

Knock knock Who's there? A fireman. You're house burned down.

Corn Muffins

Your dad is so gay that he payed for a male prostitute to have sex and now your family is in ruins.

Son: i like gaming Mom: you are wasting your life *son jumps in trash can

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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