One linners President Kinnedy did you like the parade President Lincon did you like the play

How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

A class of kids were bouncing basketballs in class and a woman teacher comes in and says,"No balls in the classroom please." All the boys leave the class.

We are unhappy, unfilled because we cannot complete our dream, it is always about us, then again, is wanting the best for others being selfish?

What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

What was a hard time for people? the great depression

Your mother is so fat that occasionally she'll have more than one serving of preserves on her toast in the morning

There are two blonds in a car, the driver to looks to the other blond (carelessly taking in her surroundings) They crash and the passenger is grusomely killed to the point of not being recognized and the driver later commits suicide from the guilt and pending law suit.

B=boy G=girl B:hey i got a good nock nock joke but you have to start it G:okay nock nock B:whos there?

A guy walks into a bar and laughs. Later, a green, homosexual dinosaur dentist escorts him out to play a houdini banjo.

How do you drown a blond girl? Forcibly hold her head under water until it enters the lungs and prevents the absorption of oxygen leading to cerebral hypoxia and myocardial infarction.

What is black and blue and doesn't like sex? The 6 year old in my basement.

so a man walks into a bar and Cancer

Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

Q: What did one water bottle say to another water bottle? A: Nothing. Water bottles are inanimate objects and are thus unable to communicate.

There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

What do you call a black man running faster than a white man? Usain Bolt

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Roses are red Violets are blue Cabbage

Q: Why were minorities denied access to the bathroom? A: It was for employees only.

Q:what's faster than a black man with you t.v A:his brother with your laptop

Your parents shouldn't have met. I was thinking that as I contemplated suicide.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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