Q. Name six animals that live in the north pole A.Four polar-bears and two penguins

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Q. Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman? A. Cause you have to hollow out it's head! A blonde walked into a doctor's office with two burnt ears. The doctor asked her, "What happened to your ear?" The blonde replied, "I was ironing and the phone rang, so instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and put it to my ear. Still not satisfied, the doctor asked, "Well, what happened to the other ear?" "The sucker called again!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because this chicken had a mental disability and saw on the news that there was a hospital on the other side of the road that could treat his illness and possibly save his life, allowing him to fulfill his life-long dream of retirement. But knowing that chickens do not possess the brain power capable of understanding the situation that this chicken was in, it had probably gotten lost and just wandered off.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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There was a scientist that was doing a social experiment with mothers and their children. The name of first kid was named candy because it was her mothers favourite thing. The second kid name was rose because it was her mothers Favourite thing. The last mother knew what was happening and said to her son "Come on Dick".

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I am fine, hungry but otherwise fine, I sometimes wish that things that come easy to you, did the same for me or others, excuse me, going to grab a bite, I hope we can chat here for a bit, it is not a chatting site the least. Say? Are you still burning mad at me? If not ill gladly give you a call, but if this is a ploy you are scheming in order to gain my trust I might be killing myself.

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says "Doc my leg really hurts when I poke it like this." The doctor replies, "Yes, that is a knife."

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? Because the numerous failed attempts of crossing over the years deemed it almost impossible, therefore, chicken could no longer see the point in life.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? He got many things, because everyone felt bad for him. Someone even brought him into their house so he could have Christmas dinner. On Christmas Day someone gave him fifty dollars to spend on food for his family. Only thing is, he didn't have a family.

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i like my rose red and my diamonds blue your screamin mercy so did ur mom but i killed her to

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Why did the black man wash his feet? PHOIT!!!! He washed his feet in a bird bath... Too bad his car got thrown off a cliff by a bald eagle with no feathers?

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What's black and Has 8 legs? Gang Rape.

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what is the most efficient way to scratch your balls? hire a leprechaun slave.

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roses are red violets are red everything is red who set my house on fire

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a brick.

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

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Where was susie after the explosion? Everywhere

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A chicken walks into a bar and orders a beer. He's not really a chicken, he's just called a chicken because he is always afraid.

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

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Why was the boy drinking toilet water? Because he was receiving a violent swirly. He then went home and killed himself.

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What do you get when you cross a black man and a Mexican man? I don't know.

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whats the difference between a brick wall and a jew? jews wear yamakas

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Why did the priest take a little boy into the back room? To talk about the boy's future.

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Have you ever tried grabbing a bottle of 7-up free and walked away with it? Moral: If it says its free, its free ffs!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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