how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

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Why did the cow hail a taxi? Because cows can't drive.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh..wait...that's actually an anti-joke already...

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An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

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If you listen to Justin Beiber all day long, what do you become? Very hungry and thirsty. And you need to go to the restroom.

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What do you call a fat guy? A fata*s mothaf*cka

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KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

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Guess what your birth certificate really is. An apology letter from the condom factory.

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A new pair of shoes

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Mack: Hello Jonathan: Hi Mack: My name is Mack, what's your name? Jonathan: My name is Billy Mack: You liar! I'm reading this post at anti-joke.com and whenever you reply, your name shows Johnathan! Johnathan: Well Mack, I guess you broke the 4th wall. By the way, this joke is over in 3, 2, 1...

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What do you call two black men walking down a stairwell? Their names.

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So, Ryan Dunn was driving under the influence of alcohol. The result of this action proved to be fatal for both Ryan and his passenger; who happened to be his close and personal friend.

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Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

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There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

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whats the difference between kroush and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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Why was the dyslexic cowboy crying when he came into school that day? He had chronic diarrhea.

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Q: what smells like cheese and tastes like cheese? A: cheese

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whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

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Why did the black man go to Jail? He was visiting his friend!

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why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

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wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

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How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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