Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

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Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Niether has he

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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Why Is Billy So Dumb? He Didin't Pass School

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This is an anti-joke. It is not funny because "anti" means the opposite of something.

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What's white and looks like paper? Paper

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How do you survive the zombie apocolypse? You avoid dieing or being mutated in the living dead.

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Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

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What does a sock, pillow and a lamp have in common? -they all live underwater expect for the sock, pillow and lamp -Matt

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What did the terrorist do to the small village? Destroy it with a bomb vest.

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when nothing goes right go left because if you go straight you will fall off the cliff

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Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

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Ask me if I'm a car. Are you a car¿ Yes¡

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Why did the little girl only walk half way across the street She fell into a man hole and died

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot, black, liquid, and in a cup.

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a gay man walks into a bar the bartender says "what'll it be today" he asks for a beer the bartender comes back with a beer because thats what he asked for.

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what is sticky and brown a black guys stick

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Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

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Feminine hygiene jokes aren't funny. Period

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How can a man go 8 days without sleeping? Sleep at night.

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

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Technically rainbows are white.....and have gold at the end.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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