Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a florist.

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Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

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Imagine that we take all of the elephants in the world and laid them out end to end in space Did you know all of the elephants would die Nature fact

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what kind of dog can tiptoe

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What do you call a chicken with three eyes? One that flew over the cuckoo's nest.

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What do you call a hairy pussy? A cat.

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This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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Q:What's black, wrinkled and smells like raisins? A: A raisin.

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If you can cut half a rope. You can cut the whole rope.

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There was a black guy and a blonde crossing the street. They are not related.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

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For 10 cents a day you can feed an African...they eat pennies.

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If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

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Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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Why was the man lying on the pavement? He was hit by a fridge

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What do you call a Fly with no wings? Dead.

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An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

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why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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whats then difference between a jew and a pizza ? A pizza doesnt scream when its put in the oven .

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the tiger.

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Knock knock who's there atch watch who? bless you

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Why does austin bell like it up the butt? Cause he's a cat a kitty cat meow meow meow and meow meow meow

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Hey you know what? What? Never mind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops