Why does the same anti-jokes pop up over and over again? Because people have no creativity.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What's green and brown, and if it fell out of a tree on you it would kill you? A billiard table?

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Knock Knock........wait there cars gone, I'll come back later

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Why can't penguins fly? Because their wings are adapted to swim and not to fly

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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what do you call one black man surrounded by ten white men.... A story teller

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

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Whats brown, sweet, and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the crossing gaurd allowed him to

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- Why an Asian crossed the road? - Because he wanted to.

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What's red,little and its in the corner??? --- Strawberry in the corner

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Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

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Why did labour not win the election in 2010? Because they are clearly shit.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay boys house. Knock knock! whose there? The chicken!!

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My wife is going to the Caribbean Jamaica? No, St Lucia

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What did one lawyer say to the other? Hello

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

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Q: What's blue and fuzzy? A: Blue fuzz

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A vampire sees a werewolf at a bar, aware of the upcoming brawl between them two, the bartender shoots them both in the head but it's okay because neither of them exist.

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A panda walks into a bar and orders a beer and a hamburger. After he eats he stands up stretches and pulls out a gun shooting everyone in the room but the bartender. The panda puts $20 on the bar and turns to leave. As he walks out the door the bartender asks why the panda shot everyone. The panda tells him to look in the encyclopedia. The bartender looks up panda and he reads: "A rare bearlike mammal (Ailuropoda melanoleuca) of the mountains of China and Tibet, having woolly fur with distinctive black and white markings. Also called giant panda, panda bear." Seeing absolutely nothing in this description that would rationalize the homicides the panda had just committed, the bartender arrived at the reasonable conclusion that the panda was psychotic and having severe psychological problems which probably caused the incident. The bartender couldn't help but wonder if this tragedy could've been avoided had the panda been properly screened for schizophrenia and guns been properly secured in a safe at the panda's mother's house.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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