Your momma is so fat, she doesn't have a birthday. She has a birthweek.

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I'm called the! no i wish am I left

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what do you do with a fat little chug...kick em in the guts

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A: What does MC Hammer like? B: Big Butts. A: Can he lie? B: No.

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*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a mustang? I don't have a mustang in my garage..

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies in a truck? A: A pile of dead babies in a truck with one alive in the middle eating his way out.

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Want to hear a joke? No.

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Wayne Rooney's face and intelligence.

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Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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what is worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Stacey has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Stacey.

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Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

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What do you call a black man? Rob

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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What's black, white and red all over? A race war

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I met her back in the 80s when she was a man.

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You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't divide by zero.

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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How many mentally challenged beings does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well one couldn't do it so adding more to the equation will only make it worse sir.

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Q: How do you make an onion cry? A: You can't, it's an onion.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops