Yo mama is so ugly that she won an award for that

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How many pastry chefs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. It's a fairly simple job.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and an a pile of crap? One is disgusting and unsanitary and the other is a pile of crap.

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Why was the girl running? She had to catch her bus.

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so a horse walks into a bar and the bartender syas why the long face and the horse says naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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What did the famer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?!?!

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A black car pulls up early in the morning and slows down by your house You see him pull a mysterious object out of his car and point it at you, The paper boy tosses a newspaper at you

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What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

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I was bangin this girl and she kept yelling the wrong name. Who's raape?

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Why did the man murder his wife? Because she would'nt do the the dishes

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why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

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Q:What is your maturity on a scale of 1 to 100? A:69

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Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

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Why was the little girl not allowed to see the pirate movie? It was sold out.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

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Q. why did the girl fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms.

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A apple a day keeps gramar away.

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What's funnier than 24? Many things, the number 24 is not very humorous.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

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Donald Trump

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops