How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called anti joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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Two penises walk into a minefield. Both are very careful with their every step and try not to be blown.

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How do you make a pool table laugh? You cant it is'nt a living thing which means emotions.

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yo momma so old that when she whent to school there was no history class

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What happens when a Jewish man with a boner walks into a wall. He gets a broken nose.

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God said onto john "come forth and receive eternal life" john came fifth and received a toaster.

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Communism hehe xd

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What do you do if a black man steals your flatscreen TV? Give up, he's probably in Mexico by now.

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What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

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What happens when two Mexicans walk up to blonde and a red head sitting in car? The Mexicans attempt to smash the windshield with crowbars because they have issues with anger. The redhead turns on the car and reverses safely.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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You know whats funny? A man cooking dinner.

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I went to a restaurant, but after I ate the food felt sick, then I remembered that I ordered penis with cum Popsicles so I knew it couldn't be the food

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What's tall black and has curly hair? A black guy

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tommy is retared

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A man goes to the potty.

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Girlfriend has 10 letters, but then again, so does freeeeedom

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Q:why is steven balmont gonna beat up mr fatty goral A:because hes a fat czech Shout out to my mandem lewis hall&moses

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Q: What did Jenna Jameson say when she heard hard banging near the front door? A: Come inside

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A young man walks into a bar. A complicated chain of events leads to him marrying the owner's second cousin's half-niece-in-law.

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Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman

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A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

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Q: What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? A: Shoveling them out with a pitchfork.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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