Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Turns out he was needed immediately at a business meeting.

what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

A black man walks into a KFC, he then realizes that he is in the wrong store, and walks out.

My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

Yes

What do you call a man that likes to play baseball? A Baseball Player.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

You know how they say cats have nine lives? They don't.

Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and mentally retarded; you sexist fiend.

Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

A horse walks into a bar. The horse says "why the short face?"

What did the kid with turrets CHEESE! say to his mom.

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead.

Q:Whats 2+2? A: 4

Man 1: Did you hear that one about that girl who killed herself? Man 2: No Man 3: Yeah, neither did I

Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

What's the difference between a clever trick and a computer programmer? A clever trick throws you for a loop, and a computer programmer throws you a for loop.

Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

How do you get a one-armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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