A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

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What do you call a bookstore with explosive offers? Barnes and Cher-Noble.

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knock knock... ...no answer

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Read This line it the tune of "If your happy and you know it" If you're reading this, Do your homework. Sincerely, Your Teacher

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Knock knock knock OCD

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Why didn't the lady answer the phone? She is deaf and mute.

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Yo mama's so stupid, she put the baby in the microwave

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How did the boy fall off his bike? A fridge was thrown off him

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knock knock whos there cops o shit come on they found out about pot lets go

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What did the smoker say when he coughed? Ohhh dam it's turned into a smokers cough

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Who has no penis Religious Believers

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Why did the black man buy a gun? Because he and his family live in a dangerous neighborhood.

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What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

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Robin, get in the car!

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Why did the pig cross the yard? Because the helicopter was chasing him.

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What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

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A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

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What did Justin beiber get for Christmas? A dildo.

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what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

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What is yellow and white and goes 150 miles down a railroad track? a duck.

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Q: What did the little jewish boy get for his birthday in 1940? A: The holocaust.

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Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

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Sure, I was not born yesterday, sounds serious, what is it?

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Why does a squirrel have the tail at the back? Because at the front it's the squirrel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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