If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

A seal walks into a club.

Yo momma so fat, she was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and is at great risk for developing heart disease!

Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They all gone.

AIDS is not a lifestyle it's a choice - and you chose wrong.

Robin, get in the car!

rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

Why did the elderly lady cross the road? Because an atomic bomb was exploding behind her

Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

A class of kids were bouncing basketballs in class and a woman teacher comes in and says,"No balls in the classroom please." All the boys leave the class.

Why was the 18 year boy afraid of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

Why didn't the black man go to work? He had to attend his sister's funeral, who just recently passed away after her long hard battle with breast cancer.

What did Justin beiber get for Christmas? A dildo.

A boy spelled the word "banana" wrong on a spelling test... Points were deducted.

What is black and blue and doesn't like sex? The 6 year old in my basement.

A man walks into a bar. He tricks a lady into smelling a rag doused with chlorophoam, and rapes her.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Stop asking stupid questions.....

Tim is a bald headed prick with an annoying voice and he looks like a clean shaven Walter White if he was on the same drugs that he was making and he looks like he smokes too much because the wrinkles on his forehead look like lips.

I am a mime

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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