Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I felt like kicking something.

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool then don't let her come up for air.

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What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

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(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

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big fat hairy gigantic enourmous erectionn CC

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Roses are nice, violets are fine, ill be the 6, if you be the 9!

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers who are you?

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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Why couldn't the blonde have kids? She had Ovarian Cancer.

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What do you call a fish with no I Defected at birth

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Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

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Why is there a rock in a boy's foot? He wasn't weraing shoes.

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How do you make etheopians rave ? glue bread to the roof

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Why can't Hellen Kelller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Why does the cow eat grass? A: Because it's green. (Cows are colorblind)

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what did the black man say to the Muslim? "you the bomb"!

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A cheeseburger and fries walk into a bar. The bartender says "sorry, we don't serve lunch"

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roses are red violets are blue the sugar bowls empty so is your head

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Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

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Why did Sally fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

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A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops