Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

Q: What did the dragon say to the other dragon A: Nothing they did'nt exicest.

Why do black people make the best milkshakes? because they use the finest ingredients

What happens when a plane with 2500 people on board crashes? There were only 165 seats.

all these jokes are horrible now

What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

what's worse than pie? alot of things.

Knock Knock Who's there? The KKK, got any blacks?

Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

How can you tell if a duck is under your bed? Look under your bed

Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because it saw some food, or because it felt threatened on the side of the road it was already on.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "I have a gambling problem."

Why did the plane to New York not land? It was redirected to Boston because of inclement weather.

What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

Help, this is an urgent message from the S.S. Obesity. We're sinking; I can't imagine why.

what can't see and has four eyes? a blind kid born with four eyes

Why did the woman get into a car accident? She was blind.

What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

when life knocks you down you don't do anything because life is a mental concept that does not have the ability to knock you down since it doesn't have a physical bodie

What is the difference between a black person and a pizza? Nothing, they both taste like chicken

I'm tired of hearing Holocaust jokes, Anne Frankly I'm disappointed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...