What do you call a dolphin mixed with a cheetah? I have no idea I was hoping you knew.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I may be ugly, but I'm also dumb.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what's a snake that has no legs a snake

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what did the man say to the doctor? how the hell would i know, ask him yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the teenager drink a beer? Because it was actually full of sizzurp

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the indian boy say to his friend? He didn't he was too busy studying

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the black man grab and tie up the white woman? Because the white woman was a serial killer who has been on the FBI's most wanted list for killing children.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock, knock. Now before I asked "Who's there" I first opened the door as then I can see who's there without having to ask them through the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

how do you make holy water? you burn the hell out of it

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How did the baby survive the car accident? He didn't. He was killed on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

There was 2 friends named Shutup and Trouble. They were camping and Trouble got lost in the woods. Shutup called the police. Shutup: Hello, is this 9-1-1 my friend is missing. Police: What is your name sir? Shutup: Shut up Police: What? Shutup: Shut up Police: What did you say? Shutup: I said Shut Up Police: Hey are you looking for TROUBLE? Shutup: Yes! Police: Guess what? We found him, he's safe in the station. We will have a officer come by a drop him off. Have a good day Mr. Shutup Shutup: Thank you

thumb_up thumb_down +10

so a man walks into a bar..... and says ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Joe: Will you remember me tomorrow? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next week? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next month? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next year? Mack: Yes Joe: Knock knock Mack: Who's there? Joe: See you forgot me already! Mack: No I didn't Joe, I thought you were going to tell me a knock knock joke. :/

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops