some weirdo nerd was just convicted of a hit and run Just kidding. All he did was suffocate your dad with a whoopee cusion.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats worse than finding a maggot in your apple? Getting Raped

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Sally fly off the swing, She had no arms Knock knock *Who's there* Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I Never apologize, I'm sorry, that's just me

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why don't meth addicts like food? Because they have not teeth to chew it with.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what is a mix of a bull dog and a shih tzu. a bread of dog that has a shaggy face and long hair

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's annoying and wears glasses? The kid next to you

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Rylan Clark

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black guy on a bike? Just because its not very nice.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I have read and agreed to the terms of service

thumb_up thumb_down -10

The Pope walks into a bar, the barman says: "What'll it be, Pope?" But the Pope's knowledge of English is tenuous at best. He mumbles something in Latin that the barman doesn't understand. The Pope becomes frustrated and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you describe a cranky rapist? Cranky and rapist

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man from timbuktu slept on a bed of nails. It was very uncomforable

thumb_up thumb_down -10

how many dicks can you fit into mia khalifa's ass

thumb_up thumb_down -10

i'm not random but cheese does get a bit purple if you leave it in your laptop then the battery dies and the sun expands and kills every dodo alive even though they're extinct but that not the point

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. They had left the keys inside and no-one was around to help.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Nero7 How are you doing? This is "Eliza" I hope I will be joining, but I cannot reach you by phone, please respond ASAP time is running out.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops