Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first moneky.. Why did the 3rd monkey fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game.. Why did the 4th monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure..

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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Why was the multi-millionaire entreprenuer sad? He went bankrupt.

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a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

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Dey see me boilin' Dey choppin' God I'm so fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juiiiiiiccccy! MR MCCANN

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How do you get your dog to stop barking? You snap its neck.

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Why do black people have white palms? Genetics.

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A witch walks into a bar and orders a drink. She gets her drink and proceeds to have a great time.

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What do you call a man with no arms and half an eye? Larry -Jack Sparrow

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Why isn't Juley at school today? Oh Her father chopped off her arms and legs, gagged her, ripped out both eyes and threw her in a lake tied to cinderblocks!

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Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

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What has 2 legs, a heart and a conscience? YER MA

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Is it a bird, Is it a plane, I don't know what it is but it's heading straight for the World Trade Centre

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Your mother is so fat because she inherited poor genes and dietary habits from her own parents.

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"You must defeat Shen Long to stand a chance"

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

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Which is better; having a billion dollars or a trillion dollars? Trick Question, you aren't that rich.

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, cause they are walls.

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And you honored it I see :P

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Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops