A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

Why did Billy fall off his bike? He tried to kill himself.

What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

Why was the ghast from minecraft crying? His family died

why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black guy on a bike? Just because its not very nice.

What do you call a fast black man with big muscles? A good source of minorities evolving.

why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

Why did George Bush climb the Statue of Liberty? I'm not sure, as this incident is not covered in any of the myriad books written about his administration.

What does a fish and a truck have in common? Nothing. One is a fish & one is a truck.

Tim is a bald headed prick with an annoying voice and he looks like a clean shaven Walter White if he was on the same drugs that he was making and he looks like he smokes too much because the wrinkles on his forehead look like lips.

roses are red, violets are fine, you be the six, and I'll be the nine.

Who doesn't love finding money in your pocket when you go to put your pants on? a rape victim

Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

A man walks out of a bar. Gets in his car and crashes because drunk driving isn't safe.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Ron Sparks.

Bill goes and buys 45 watermelons, what does he have? 45 watermelons.

your life

You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

How do you solve a scatter plot? Give a pencil to Michael J. Fox.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

A pope meets another one

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...