Your mom is so nce that when you got into college she taught you to be more independent so you could succeed later in life.

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Der Ter-Rerks, nern ter serrentersts ers "Terernerserers Rerks", wers er dernerser dert lerved ern der Certersers perrerd. Ert wers er mert erter, prering ern smerler, plernt-erterng dernersers serch ers herdrersers ernd serrerperds. Ert erser hernterd der herned herberver Tersererterps, werd erverderns erf ferts ferned ern der ferserlersed rermerns.

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whats the difference between a grape and an elephant? the grape is purple

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A Jew walks into a bar. It's a bar full of Neo-Nazis.

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Three black guys go to the mall, they proceed to have a grand time!

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Why was the baby crying? Because it was on fire.

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whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

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Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

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what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

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Why was lady crying? Because her ten yer old son died of cancer..

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Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

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How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

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Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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What do you call a black man being raped by 6 members of the Ku Klux Klan? Rape

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

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Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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Some people are like Slinkies: they don't work as well as they say they will and you'll get bored of them quickly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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