Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours belong in the zoo But dont worrie ill be there Not in a cage But laughing at you

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A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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what do u call a Muslim flying a plane??? 9-11

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What's a lil plus a lot A little more then a lot

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How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

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What do you call something green and fuzzy? Grass, I lied about the fuziness.

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So, why won't the blonde date the Asian guy? Because she's afraid of commitment.

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Man- Where can I find a book on the holocaust Book keeper- Have you tried comedy? Man- no I havent Book keeper- good it won't be there

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A man walks inti a bar and asks for a drink, he shows the bartender his ID and is kicked out because the man is underaged.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

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Women's Rights

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Are you black? Kill yourself.

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Haikus are lovely But sometimes do not make sense Refrigerator

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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why did the mans alarm clock go off at six am? he has a high paid job he doesnt want to let down.

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What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants!"

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Thats malarious! When something is so funny that... malaria

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Why did the black guy buy a jug of grape soda Because he was thirsty

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What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

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Who's mean and white and really not nice? Hitler

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Yo mama's so fat, she had a lap-band procedure.

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What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? A cone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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