Whats sad about 6 mexicans driving off a cliff in an escalade? An escalade sits 7 people.

An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

whats the difference between ian bothom and david gower? shredded wheat.

What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six had severe paranoia.

Why couldn't tom concentrate on his homework? Because he was a loaf of bread.

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

Why do people laugh at anti-jokes? Because of a chemical reaction to a neurological phenomenon that results from the brain's response to external stimuli.

What do you call a man with a spade stuck in his head? An ambulance, he may be in need of urgent medical assistance

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia......

Matrix if it had been with (as planned at some stage) with Will Smith. Normal Neo: Yes trinity lets find the others. Smith Neo: Yo pretty lady, lets go find them ho`s and chicken and stuff, then we can like go surfin and driving nuts and all that crackin stuff and then we etc etc. Normal Neo:... Smith Neo: You tellin ME this is your world Smith? Im Anderson yo and the one, Im gonna bitchmack you all and then just whoop you all with my master blaster no kidding buddy I have yellow belt Kung fu yo! Neo: We have to do something. Smith Neo; Yo unless we make a real rap video first we cant do the proper stuff you, why is this place all so green, get some colaaas! Seriously first we get carlton and then he dances his crazy dance while I go boyAAAAAAAAAAAAAAZ with my rap ok?

Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

speacking of cheese... steve jobs died

A Hispanic walks into an alleyway and sees two of his rich friends. He desperately needs money and only has enough time to shoot one of them because he sees the police following him. He decides which one to shoot... Wait, if he has enough time to think about this shouldn't he just shoot both of them?

There are two angry guys in a park on their lunch break What do they do? They eat their sandwich and go back to work to settle a peace treaty.

So the priest took the 6 year old boy into the confessional...and He told him to say 3 Hail Mary's.

Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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