I man walks into a bar. He drinks four beers, gives the bartender his keys, and takes a cab home. The next day he gets his best friend to drop him off at the bar, picks up his car, and is three minutes early to work.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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What is the difference between an Australian and an Ethiopian? One is from Australia the other is from Ethiopa

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Q. Why did little suzy fall off her swing? A. She dosen`t have any arms. Knock knock. Whos there? Not Suzy.

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There's an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman. They are all trapped in a jail cell. Eventually they all starved to death.

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What's worse than falling in the mud whilst wearing a suit? Burying your parents.

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Jamie Oliver eats a chip

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What happens when a fat guy falls ? Ohio has another earthquake.

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what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? a broken head.

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop 397, IF you have a big tounge

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why didnt jane scream when she got robbed? Because she got shot.

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so i was on anti joke and i read a joke, it made me laugh.

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A man was caught cross dressing by his wife. She divorced him.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Does this rag smell Like chloroform to you?

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someone tell england that a depressed guy smoking a cigarette is not a movie.

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why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

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3 black guys walk into a restaurant and they sat down, ate their meals, and even tipped the waitor handsomely then for about 10 minutes they talk and then leave restaurant. Soon after a white guy comes and holds up the place for all it's money then killing three hostages before being taken down by the police.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Police. Your family is dead...

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? HE didn't. He watched where he was going.

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what did the bus driver say to the black man when he got on the bus? nothing, carl has become very anti-social since his brother died

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Why did a little boy have a black eye? Because his father is very abusive to him and his sister. They are beaten every dad after the father comes home drunk from the bar because his wife also the kids mother died in a car acciedent 1 month before this. Child abuse is not funny and neither is a dead mother.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesnt rhyme And your entire family died trying to fly to your house for Christmas. They crashed into a orpanage for death children. There were no survivors.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops