What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

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Showcasing you? Really? I am tired too, yeah its daytime here as well, sleep well then. Hey, by the way, when you where like posting a lot of weird comments, where you trying to impress me?

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An asian woman was driving along the freeway one day when a police officer pulled her over and arrested her, The officer arrested her because she had killed her husband 5 years ago and she thought she had gotten away with it.

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Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Walt dies in breaking bad.

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Johny wanted a pogo stick for his birthday. Johny's mom got him a pogo stick for his birthday. The day of Johny's birthday, he fell off the pogo stick and broke his arm.

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What's the best example of an anti-joke? This one.

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

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Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

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Who has big muscles and is good at wrestling? A wrestler

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

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Want to hear a clean joke? Soap.

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roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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You Scream, I Scream, The cops come, It's awkward

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Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

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What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

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What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

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Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

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What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

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Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

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Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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