What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

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Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

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I am pleased and honored to hear you speak that beautifully straight from your heart Nero, you are without equal, unmatched. And he who is unmatched, also stands alone.

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Anti-Joke is a sticky wicket.

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whay did the monkey fall out of the tree? he was dead. why did the cat fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

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You!!!!!! Cause your whole existence is just one big joke.

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Why don't meth addicts like food? Because they have not teeth to chew it with.

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You know what's a real drag? A club foot

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Phil.

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the light bulb and two to file a lawsuit.

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Why do blind people laugh at this joke? Because they can't read it and everyone else is laughing.

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Why do all black people have AIDS? Because they deserve it.

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What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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Did you hear about the homosexual that walked out of a hospital? He just found out he was HIV positive. (ic3)

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What animal wouldn't you want to play games with? Probably none of them. They are animals and incapable of playing board games.

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A guy wearing a top hat walks into a bar. He says, "Ow."

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What do you call a man with a horse? A man

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Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

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Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Food and blankets from a nearby shelter.

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My friends all use twitter but i dont know how to use it, so i said i will carry a megaphone around saying what i am doing at random times. Like yesterday i was in the library so i said into my megaphone "i am in the library" Yay i got 3 new followers, 2 of them were cops. Jokes From Blox Computers Corporation [Thailand] Bellow Joke In Thai: ?????? Twitter ???????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ? ???????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? "i am ??????????" ??????????????? 3, 2 ????????????????????

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

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Why was the boy crying in public with no clothes on? Because he had no clothes on in public.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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