Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Want to hear a joke? Obama

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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What is yellow outside, black inside, and makes you laugh when it falls? A school bus full of black people falling from a clif

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Can we still mine for gold in the American River? No, anyone seen mining for gold is considered a hobo and all the gold is cleared out by random people in the 17 century

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How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

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How do you say hooker in Chinese? ?

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What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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Three men were on a plane. Oh wait. You probably already heard this one.

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Why is Tommy dead? Because he died.

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what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

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Why was Jacob not allowed to play sports? He fell down in the middle off the street and got ran over 50 times and could never do anything again.

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What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

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Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

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Why did the black man go to jail? Because he committed a criminal offense.

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what did hitler say when the allies invaded germany i did NAZI that coming

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Paris Hilton spend 2 whole days in the slammer due to possesion of narcotics. I would have gotten 20 to life... no... it's not funny...

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Why was the girl crying? She prolapsed.

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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There was three women stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

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Your mama is so black, she contributes regularly to the NAACP and the United Negro College Fund. Her donations and volunteer work help greatly.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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