Guy: do u wanna hear a joke about my dick? Nah its to long Girl: Do u wanna hear a joke about my vagina? Actually that would make me very self concious I have ghonorrea and would appreciate not having to tell one.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

"what did the priest say to the rabbi?" "what" "my religions better

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Hay is for horses and other hay consuming mammals.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you get when you cross a rhino and a whale? Comment your answer:

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Do you know any anti-jokes. Yeah, I do. It's a bit pointless though.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A duck walks into a grocery store. He looks at the shopkeeper, who then grabs a broom and shoos him back outdoors.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Red are roses Blue are violets Dyslexic am I.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is Blue, Pink, and Green, and sometimes sparkles when wet? Grass. I lied about the Blue and Pink to throw you off...because I can.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what has balls and is long and suckible? Spaghetti

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what would happen if every overweight person in america jumped at the same time? they would all get a little exercise.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats black and red and dead? Nobody could tell, but they were sure that it wasn't a dead black person, so stop being racist!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did Michael Jackson retire from basketball? Michael Jackson never played basketball, but was nonetheless one of the most successful musicians to ever live.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Like this if you want people to stop asking to have their jokes liked.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops