Why did the koala fall of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other koala fall off the tree? It was stapled to the first koala.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's green and invisible? This cabbage in my hand.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock knock. Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mop who? (I eat ma poo) Haha. ~Ali M.~

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was cooked with eleven herbs and spices.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the floor. How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail the other one to the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats the difference between males and females? fe

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do u call a man who sells hot dogs on the street? A Mexican

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the car drink Slurpies? I don't know. Why? Doorknob. Carl was unsure on what his friend, Frank meant when he told his joke, but then again who IS sure? Frank is the only one who truly knows what happened that day on August 13th 2010 when his mother came over for a surprise visit to her son's house just as Frank was heading out the door about to get in his truck and buy groceries, unaware that his mother was standing outside and bending over to ring the door bell not to expect Frank opening the door with his quick and violent actions thus hitting his mother in the face as the door swung open. Frank hadn't known his mother was at his house nor even remembered him but there she was, past out bleeding to death on his front lawn. It was Frank's fault that day, when his mother past away and reason why Frank hides his anger through his jokes. If only he hadn't opened that door he tells himself every night. Now he's cursed himself with his odd humour of using doorknobs as punchlines to hide his grief of his loss. And with that, Carl replies; Ummm.... I don't get it.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Excuse me, do you have any gnats? Yes, plenty. Thank you

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what did the little girl with cancer get for christmas? cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the gay man receive for christmas? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the woman eat her sandwich. She was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the little boy say when he was asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the difference between a black person and cancer? If you don't know already, you should really question your countries education system and your parents upbringing.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Blonde Girl: Why is this green-painted man throwing forks at me?! Green-Painted Man: It is confusing you, no?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What time is it? If I hadn't poked your eyes out, you might know.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops