What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?white vans

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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Why did the boy drop his lolypop Because it tasted bad

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two men write a poem one says quack the other says woof what is the middle of the number witch is amazing because who ever is reading this you are beautiful and have chucken food ion your cheek bone connected to the knee cap indeed i shall write on to you guys saying how lovley it is TO MAKE FIRENDS WITH CHICKENS

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If a Cheetah and Usain bolt raced in the Olympics who would win? Obviously Usain hes black and cheetahs can't perform in the olympics

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and mentally retarded; you sexist fiend.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Irune. Irune who? Irune my life with all this red sand.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Orange. Orange Who? No, this is Homeland Security. We have raised the current terrorism threat level to Orange, which means there is a high risk of terrorist attacks. Please report any suspicious behavior.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because he wanted to. Problem, AntiJoke community?

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Why did the little girl cry? Her mom died

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop 397, IF you have a big tounge

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What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? You don't have to cook an onion to eat it.

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I once was told that life is like a box of chocolates, but then realized that it wasn't

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steven hawking walks into a bar just kidding he has a horrable disiese preventing him from walking

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what do you do when you see a black man punching a girl? act like you dont see it and get the hell out of harms way

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Why is my penis 2 inch hard? Because I rape little boys with it and there tight little asshole are crushing it

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sit in the dark for about 4 or 5 hours covered in Vaseline with a huge dildo inside of your arse

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In soviet Russia...things are different

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why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

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A man was walking home when a little boy ran up to him. He said "hey mister, how do you sleep apples?" Then the man wasn't sure why he asked him so he spelled it out for him "that's easy my boy, A-P-P-L-E" the little boy said "you said pee pee!" Then he laughed and ran off

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What do you call a person who kills there own child? Casey Anthony.

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John has 37 candy bars and eats 36 of them? What does John have? Diabetes, John has Diabetes.

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What did the dinosaur say to the centipede? It's funny cause the dinosaur is big and the centipede is small.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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