How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

Knock Knock Who's there? Who Who who? Hoodini

Why did the chicken get taken into the kitchen? If u dont get this you need to go b ack to school

Your mother is so fat that I would call her quite fat indeed.

Your mom is so fat, that i don't think she's attractive anymore.

S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Light turned green, indicating that it was a safe and appropriate time to cross

Whats worse than your roof caving in on you? Being stabbed by yard gnomes.

Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

Why did Lisa let go of the monkey bars? she was being molested

What did Nick Comado say to the black person? Hello I live at 317 North 12th Street, Beech Grove, Indiana, USA. PLEASE come murder me and my family

There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

Two friends are sitting on a couch watching TV. One friend accidently turned on a pornography channel. The other friend felt awkward and went home.

why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

why did the black man shoot himself? because he commited a crime and was sorry for what he had done

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in a circle.

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, but I don't know how they got in there.

Have you seen Ray Charles' new house? Neither has he...

There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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