Why did the chicken cross the road? He was at a crosswalk and had the right of way to on coming traffic

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My little league baseball coach measured the team for cups. Its 9 years later and we still dont have those cups.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Why did she fall again? Because somebody put her back on. Why wasn't she able to hug her dad? Because she has no dad.

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Why was the black girl happy? She got a raise.

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What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

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Why did the old man fall down the stairs? Because he was on his wheelchair.

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What makes my fourth grade librarian hot? The fact that I set her on fire

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A man once had a monkey, and it made him very happy. then one day, his monkey ran away. So the man was very sad and screamed, "I knew i should have broken the monkey's legs!!"

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If the 49ers won the superbowl

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What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He had no legs

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Q: How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 1, idiot.

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Hey there, I like bananas! No you don't.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because early that morning she had found out that her husband had left her for another chicken. She became depressed and soon was suicidal so she started looking for an option out of her pain. So she tried to cross the road... She never made it.

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What did the whale do when he was angry? He beached himself, causing a major ecological disaster and costing the beach community thousands of dollars to return him to the water.

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What do you call a bug stepped on 47 times, then burned to a crisp? Dead

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What has hands but can't clap? - A Quadraplegic

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Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

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roses are red vilest are blue shes mine and if you take my place my fist will go in your face

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We spent trillions of tax payer's money on the death of 1 man... wait that's not funny...

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why was the boys t.v broken? because he through it out the window

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What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

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girl. have you seen my duck man. yes he is with me right now girl rely you have him man. yes in my diner girl. d.i.c.k. man.f u

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops