A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

I don't have friends, so I'm anti-social.

A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

Man 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Man 2: Sure. Man 1: Okay.

Q: Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? A: Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human. Actually a perfect circle doesn't exist.

knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Skeletons neither have muscles nor brains to control any muscles and therefor cannot transport themselves across a road or any stretch of land for that matter.

Why did Tommy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Tommy.

A cripple and a Jew walk into a bar. They sit down and begin to discuss all the stigmas that they have faced their entire lives. The conversation goes on for an hour, at which point a black man walks in. Just then, the bar explodes and they all die.

im 14, over weight and spotty! you interested? .... im desperate:)

Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

A Chinese man fails a math test

What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

When the world ends what would be the death toll It would be unknown since every one would be around to calculate it

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Reading re-posts of classic anti jokes posted by lonely teenagers.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am colorblind because Iam a dog.

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

Why did the blackman fall off the bike? Because he stole it.

I had friends on the Death Star.

What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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