A woman sees a sign on a store that says "husbands for sale." Curious, she walks inside. The clerk says "These men will be perfect husbands, they'll cook and clean for you and see to your every need." Shocked, the woman calls the police and reports the store for human trafficking.

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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Q: why was the baker a coward? A: his own mother told him his potential would amount to nothing more than a baker and when a dinosaur came into the bakery he ran away

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What red and goes up and down? A tomato in an elevator.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What happened to the Jewish child that used to live life like a normal kid? Him and his family were taken to a ditch and shot to death. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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We decided to post a joke on anti-joke and see if we can get any rapings

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A magician was driving down the road and turned into a driveway...

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It's not ok to have intercourse with a woman who say's "No!" But what about "Let go of me!"?

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Why did the bus driver tell the black man to get to the back of the bus? Because all the seats up front were full and its dangerous to stand in a moving vehicle

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What's worse than finding 16 dead babies in a tree? Finding 1 dead baby in 16 trees.

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What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

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How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

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What's similar between a black man and jelly babies? Nothing

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So I'm balls deep in this 9 year old...

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

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Two men walk into a bar. The first man says to the bartender "I'd like some h2o". The second man says "I'd like some h2o to". The second man died.

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Why did the woman say ow? She was shot in the foot

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What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape the hen.

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What did the blonde say to the other blonde? "Hey, do you want to get something to eat?"

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rodents are bed violents are glue i have lysdexia and short attention spa

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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