Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

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what in the world is smarter than the world's smartest man? Nothing he is the smartest man.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face?" the man replies, "my wife has terminal cancer and has been given 2 weeks to live."

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Two icebears are siiting on a iceberg one says to the other: Are you fine with me pushing you off? the other one responds: Would you marry me?

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My cake is yummy, It's icing is blue. It will always be mine, Come close and I'll punch you. So stay away from it And you will be safe, But if you dont listen, Prepare ice for your face!

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Two Black Males walk into a bar. A white old lady leaves cautiously. Everyone else stays and has a great time with them as they are actually two very good guys, and funny too.

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What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

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Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

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Why did the blonde fail her drug test? She's actually never did drugs before but since she didn't show up for appointment, that counts as an automatic fail.

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Roses are red Heres something new Violets are violet not fucking blue

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write I if you think we should all yell A when dylan says orange.

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Say, "I have a really nice knock knock joke, but you have to start." To someone. They say knock knock You say who's there! and walk away.

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Non-Anti-Joke.com!

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When the sun goes down... Most of the guys pants goes down too. Just be straight XD

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.

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What walks on the three legs? Martin, he was born with a tragic birth defect and struggles to make a living.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

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Q: Do you know how to save a black man from drowning? A: No. GOOD!

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Guess what my nephew said yesterday? oh wait, i forgot hes dead..

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

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Why did the other reindeer make fun of Rudolph? He had a small penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops