What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no reason. Chickens don't have the thinking skills to reason.

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Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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What's worse than falling in the mud whilst wearing a suit? Burying your parents.

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How many immature teenagers does it take to change a light bulb? Ya mum.

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What do you call a Black guy who flies planes? A pilot

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what did the black, asian and jew have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantoulope.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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if life hands u melons, make melonade.

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How do you drown a blond? You hold her underwater.

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Sugar is sweet. Plums are too. Prison rape isn't funny either.

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How do you stop a baby from crying? You hit it with an axe.

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What's brown and smells like shit? My boxers.

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Jamie Stegman was dead. LOL

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i did a 360 noscope, then i jizzed. from dylan

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Once upon a time there was a magical duck in a magical kingdom. Nothing interesting ever happened to it and it was eaten by a magical fox.

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What do u call a gay dinosaur Tyran a sore arse

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A black man, an asian man, and a gay man walk into a bar. What do they do? They mourn the loss of their dead friend.

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knock know. who there?.............. whose there?.........whose there!?!?! damn kids

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Father "Why so down son?" Son "I've always been this short..."

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A frog jumped on the lilly pad, it sank and drown and all of the tadpoles didn't have a mother and inevitably died

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A man is walking on the beach, he trips on a mystical lamp and dusts i off a little. turns out that it was just a lamp, he droped it back on the sand and was arrested for littering.

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Roses are red violets are blue, I more do like pink like the holes are in you.

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WHY WAS 6 AFRAID OF 7? I REALLY DONT KNOW!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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