How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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Puns are terrible. I love them.

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Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

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What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long Nothing at all

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If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

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Where did Wendy decide to work for her part time job? TACO BELL

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An Irish man, an English man, and a Scottish man are standing on the edge of a cliff. The English man and the Scottish man both fall of. The Irish man calls the authorities to alert them of this tragic misfortune.

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What did the home-less man eat for dinner last night? Nothing.

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How did the cat get outside? It fell out the window

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why was the postman sad? because ran over a small child with his truck

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Whats black and white and red all over? A dead zebra

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How do you kill a Jewish person? Like any other person, they are like any other person of any race and religion.

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Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee gettiing bigger and bigger and bigger.." Then it hits me.

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a woman goes to an abortion clinic, kills a baby and still leaves pregnant.

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Why is it scientifically proven that even Spider-Man would be a match for Superman? Because none exist. Moral: The only Super Hero... not scientifically proven, but I exist so that makes me stronger than both of them!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

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How do you make a grown man cry? Fling a rubber band at him.

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What is a holocaust survivors favorite food nothing

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Yo momma stank so bad, she might have a serious vaginal infection. You should take her to the hospital.

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What did the black man do for his science project Which is better homemade or colonel sanders?

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why was kade sad? he shit himself

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Inspirational story: There once was an ugly old man who was so ugly everyone died. The end -Matt

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Why did Jimmy go to a Barbershop for the first time? He needed a haircut, and the salon next to his house was closed because of financial problems

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Dear Six, Please stop spreading rumors about me and nine. I hear you two also do some pretty nasty things. Love, Seven.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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