Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were 5 brothers chasing it with a bat.

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What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

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Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? You don't. You just shut up and listen.

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HAHAHAHAHAHA.....shut up your joke isn't better.

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rent a cops

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Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

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How does a black guy die? Unknown

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call it, they aren't going to come.

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Why do bitches love cheese toast? 'Cuz bitches love cheese toast

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a chicken walks into a bar and gets drunk. the locals then proceed to tell the police because the chicken was harrassing people after he got drunk

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb? NONE A YO F******G BUSINESS!!!

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What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

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What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut... A Heart Attack.

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Maroon 5 to a bitch: Cross my heart and hope to die... wait why don't i just kill you bitch!

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YOU KNOW WHO ELSE LOVED AND NURTURED ME THROUGH MY CHILDHOOD YEARS? MY MOM.

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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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Aodhans da is Mr.Bradly and he dosnt know what coordinates are, 180 anti-clockwise,he has "the key to examination success is revision and homestudy tattooed on his chest, his das herbert the pervert, his mas a taxcollector and on the dole, his da sits on the roof eating biscuits, cleaning the satilite dish, he gets his pubes shaved in gordans chemist, he uses mcdonaldsd wifi, hes a fruit fly and he can stop global warming by shaking his head!!!!!!!!

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what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

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Why did the man lose the poker match in the jungle? He was playing a cheetah.

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What's worse than a burglar breaking into your house in the middle of the night? A rapist breaking into your house in the middle of the night.

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How do you learn how to drive? You get in the driver seat

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What do you get when you stab Al with a sword? At

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops