Why did the Muslim cross the road? He was on fire and he needed to get to the lake on the other side of the street to put himself out.

There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

hey hey hey wanna hear a joke.....................................MENS IQ!!!!!!

Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

What did one dog say the the other dog? "We are both dogs"

A man looks at a glass and says that it is half full. Another man looks at the glass and says that it is half empty. A feminist looked at the glass and said it was being raped

why did the chicken cross the road ? how else is he going to get to the other side

"hey bro" "WHATS UP" "nothin..... I heard you had your first bj yesterday." "YEAH!!" "how'd it taste?" ........

What did the man on the moon say? Nothing. He died because his supply of oxygen ran out.

wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

A rat and a pig rape a puppy. Hey, that's just life.

Why did the teenager take a shower? Because she was brutally raped by a serial rapist and felt dirty. Unfortunately for her, she was unaware that she was washing off the prints from her body and the rapist was never found

Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

What did Elmer Fudd say when Bugs Bunny got away again? "Oh, dat dawn wabbit, I'ww get it some day".

What do you do if life gives you lemons? Whoa... where did these lemons come from?

what is sticky and brown a black guys stick

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

Sosiopath vs How I met your mother: BABABABABA BABABA RARARA LALALA ETC YOU GOT THE DRILL Kids, this is how I met your mother. I saw her at some store, I said "Hey sexy" She told me to fuck off, so I raped her, got out of prison years later, and kids, that is how I met your mother. ...Why I am leaving? Did I ever fucking say I was your father? I Just came here to tell you I raped and killed her after serving my time which was about 2 minutes, so kids, that is how I killed your mother. YOU ARE WELCOME BY THE WAY!Ungrateful kids. Moral of the story: If they are your kids, just say no and get away, and kill Robin for better television. Sociopath vs Grounded for life Moral: Shot the little kid, nobody will notice, not even his own family.Heck if you look at episode 34 you can see a tall handsome dude choking the life of a little boy in the background, and then letting him go just before he passes out and chokes him again? FUN FOR HOURS!

A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

Three muffins are walking next to each other in the dessert. The muffin on the right says "Hey now it's my turn to walk in the middle!"

What did the black guy say when he failed his math test? Crap, I failed my math test!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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