What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

Why did the policeman who's third wife just lost 20 pounds go to sleep? He was tired.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

Killing your friend as a joke.

Robin, get in the Batmobile.

What kind of dance does an alien do? None, aliens aren't real.

what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

An elephant walked into a bar. By bar I mean jungle. Elephants aren't capable of walking into a bar.

women rights

A Muslim man gets onto a transatlantic airliner. All the other passengers are privately nervous, but no one mentions it.

Why is the sky blue? Because it is

What's red, crunchy, and hard to chew. A brick.

What starts with "F" and ends in "uck" Firetruck.

Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

Call of Duty Infinite Warfare

I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

A boy kills DEER & cooks it & doesn't tell friends what it is. He gives a clue "Its what my girlfriend calls Me!..

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i know where you live now I'm coming for you

My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

What starts with P and ends in ORN Popcorn!

A man walks off a bus. How did he get on top of it in the first place?

What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...