What do an elephant and a grape have in common? Well, depending on your ideological views they are either both God's creations or two examples of species which have evolved over time. That is all.

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, 'at least it shall be over quickly.'

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Find the b dddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd

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Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

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What walks on the three legs? Martin, he was born with a tragic birth defect and struggles to make a living.

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who should be competing in the paralympics? Brent the retard!

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Why did the little girl cry? The little girl cried for mercy as her attackers violated every inch of her innocent body, tearing her up from the inside until her organs were forced out of her anus and blood squirted from her ears as the pressure inside her body exceeded to a maximum. After the attackers were done with the corpse, they cut off her limbs and stapled them to her head.They placed her now decomposing body on the front porch of the worried parents' house and rang the doorbell.

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what comes in a can ? Beans Where do beans come from ? Cans

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Do you know whats a joke? Something said or done to evoke laughter or amusement, especially an amusing story with a punch line.

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How do you remind your kids of family? You brand them with the family crest.

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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How many Jews can you fit in to a car? Well depending on the car 2-8

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why did the monkey fall out of a tree?? a snail threw a refridgerator at him

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How do you know a black man's been in your backyard? If you throw a barbecue and your friends of African-American descent decide to bring cold cuts.

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What did Hitler get his son for Christmas? An Ez-bake oven and a GI Jew

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint.

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What Sound does a baby make in a blender? I don't know I'm to busy masturbating to it

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haha women's rights.....what a joke.

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how many dumbasses does it take to make a kushagra

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Put down your barbie. Get in the car.

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whats sad about 4 black guy drivein off a cliff in a cadalic a wast of good cadalic

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Why was the teenage girl pregnant? She got raped by her dad.

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How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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