Why was the black man running? He has to stay fit for the army.

"Do you like pie?" "No." "Do you like blueberries?" "No." "I have something you won't like." "Is it a blueberry pie?" "No, I shagged your wife last night".

what has wheels and is red. A heart, i lied about the wheels.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To suck my dick

Why are all the other numbers scared of 7? Beacuse 7 stabbed his mother with a steak knife.

The sword that kills, the sword that gives life.

What do you call two dog? dogs

why did you poop because you are a poop

Haiku's aren't real poems. No body understands them. My soul is burned toast.

how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? open the door and put him in.

Why did nobody like Anne? She was disabled

Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

Three men walk into a bar. One of them is not planning to consume alcohol because they are responsible and he is the designated driver.

why did the guy laugh at everything he was high

You're so ugly, when yo' mama dropped you off at school, she kissed your forehead and called you beautiful.

what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

What do u call a six year old boy holding a gun. illegal

Antijokes...

Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

went to mass. remembered to say with your spirit.

what are you your not a human? are you an other?

A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

yo mamma so fat she should probably look into a clinical weight loss program and exercise daily.

What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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