A baby seal walks into a club. He immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get to the hospital before he lost to much blood from his stab wound.

Why did the boy throw his alarm clock out of the window? Because he was angry at the alarm going off

Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

What happened to the girl who got an infection from an abortion? She died.

What did the tree say to the kite? She got hit by a fridge.

Why did the elephant cross the road? To run away from the angry chicken who was mad that he was slacking off work.

why did your mum die young because she had canser

I see London. I see France. Show me your boobs.

What's the difference between a trampoline and a cat? I take mu cleats off when I jump on a trampoline.

Two peanuts were crossing a road. One was salted.

What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus? Trying not to laugh.

why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

A gay man watches football.

Yo mama's so fat she got baptized in Sea World.

what happened to the girl that didn't forward the threatening chain text to ten people? nothing.

Q: How many Jews can you fit in a 4-seater car? A: 4

Why did the boy get coal in his stalking. Cause he wants to be a geologist and that's what he asked for.

What's the difference between video games and a naked chick? The Holocaust.

Your momma is so fat, when she bent down to get a peice of wood, she fell down the steps.

Why was 95 lb jack able to chug so fast? Because he is a diabetic

Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

people say i have big feet but you know what the say about people with big feet? :) big socks. sl

what is like a duck and quacks ? A duck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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