Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at a grocery store? Because I wanna spill some milk on the floor so they can call spill on aisle 9 and I'll be there waiting for you and watch you clean my mess.

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Lololol

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A man walks into a bar…. he then looks around checking to make sure no one saw this abashing action. He sees no one did then plashing a big smile on hst face he begins to strut forward only to trip over an empty can of spray cheese. it is important to note that this spray cheese was low fat

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what`s green and flys a plain i was kidding about the green

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what's the best way to remove leaves from a tree? take them off

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Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

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would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

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When life gives you lemons, you go to a therapist and seek help because your dementia has progressed to the point that you are seeing and feeling illusions.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Its children were just slaughtered.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Simply because he stopped and looked both ways.

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Did you hear about the Irish man that accidently killed himself,he farted in the bath & drowned trying to smell it

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Your're racist.

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A man walks into a house, and the next day was taken to the hospital for a minor concussion and a possible vision deficiency.

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Patient: "Doctor, my arm hurts when I poke it with my index finger." Doctor: "That's because your finger is broken."

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What is worse than being eaten alive by a shark? Being force fed live goat intestines while Kevin Spacey rapes your father.

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-Your mom worked as a prostitute and died a virgin.

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What do you get when two black men walk into a bar? A few salesmen celebrating their recent pay raise.

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Women outside of the kitchen.

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Yo mamma is SO fat, she is classified as fat.

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Q: What did the Lone Ranger say when he saw his horse coming? A: Here comes my horse.

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

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A German, an Irishman, a Mexican and a Texan are flying together on an airplane over the ocean. When the plane begins to experience engine trouble, they find that there is only one parachute for the four of them! Through an amazing display of flying skill, however, the pilot is able to complete the flight and land safely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops