Your dad must be a drug dealer because I saw him in your kitchen snorting cocaine

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Did you hear the one about the Mexican that went to college? All his life, Juan wanted to get a decent education, but was unable to due to his family's low income. So Juan worked hard all his life, and got a part-time job. He made a little cash here, a little there. He also studied vigorously, getting a 33 on his ACT. All that work eventually paid off, and Juan was eventually accepted at Princeton University. Juan is now a highly paid Neurological surgeon, and has saved countless lives

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock knock. Who's there? The Police. Your family is dead...

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What should you say when someone says a bad joke? I'm sorry, your joke cannot be completed as dialed. Please hang up and don't try again.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What happened when the black man tried to cross the road Nothin. He tripped on a bug trying to get on the edge

thumb_up thumb_down -14

There's a white guy and a black guy, on a bridge. Of corse the idiot white guy jumps off. But the black guy yells, I NEVER LIKED U!!!!! Later that day the police showed up and asked wat happened. The black guy said, U GOT NO EVIDENCE!!! The police say true and walk away. Then go to Dunkin Donuts and get a triple chocolate donnut and coffee. They lived happily ever after. Except for the white guy. :)

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How was Charles Manson able to get women to kill for him? Because he was charismatic and intelligent.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

whats the fastest way to be murdered tell your wife your cheating on her

thumb_up thumb_down -14

a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why such the long face?" the horse is now crying in tears because the bartender made him. by Brennan pickrell

thumb_up thumb_down -14

If your Jewish, then don't go to Germany.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Confucius says... He with whom neither slander that gradually soaks into the mind, nor statements that startle like a wound in the flesh, are successful may be called intelligent indeed.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

-Knock! Knock! -Who's there? -Bob. Is Brian's here? -Wrong adress. Brian's home is the first one at your right. -Oh sorry. Have a nice day.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man walks out of a bar. Gets in his car and crashes because drunk driving isn't safe.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was the girl's clitoris cut off? Her country practiced Sharia Law.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

how much fish could a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A muslim, a priest, and a raabi walk into a bar. All three of them agree that it hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why didn't Joe want to stand up? Because he had no legs!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Whats 1+1? window!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock knock! Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A boy called Justin bieber fell down a hole and died

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops